It's Okay
by Ryebread321
Summary: An alternate ending to Geography Club. A/N: This is the movie version of the Geography Club, not the book. Sorry to post it here, but there is no movie category.


It was almost as if he was having an out-of-body experience. He could see himself from afar; a coward; a scavenger waiting in the brush for the predators to finish the kill before he investigated.

Kevin stalled, pausing in the chaotic hallway to observe his teammates from a distance. He watched passively as the guys that he had proudly called "friends" bullied their peers onto the straight and narrow.

Jared twisted his cappuccino features into a contemptible sneer as a girl veered towards the meeting with the "geography club". With a rosy flush of embarrassment and shame, she straightened her mask once more while slipping into the crowd of teenagers who never offered her one word of help. Nolan, with his backwards baseball cap, heckled passersby with jeers about their sexuality which made some students roll their eyes in annoyance while others stared at their shoes in deep concentration with anguished expressions. His other teammates varied between making lewd sexual innuendos and offensive remarks all to deter those who craved acceptance from feeling safe and comforted.

Never in his life did Kevin feel such a mix of pure guilt and helplessness. He had just stood by and allowed his classmates to be harrassed, but if he tried to play hero, he would reveal his deepest secret and desire. No matter what he did, he couldn't win.

Kevin was the definition of an all-American high school kid with two loving parents, a promising football scholarship waiting for him when he graduated, and a decent amount of popularity that came with being the school sports star.

All he dreamed of was to play football and it was a simple dream. He had hardly asked for much.

Despite what he wanted, there were times when his eyes lingered a little too long on a few of the guys in the locker room and he hadn't shown any interest in the many girls that had vied for his attention. He was so sure he could fake it until he was ready to reveal how he felt, who he was, to the world. Life, however, never failed to screw with Kevin's well thought out plans.

The football jock leaned against a nearby row of lockers, running his sweaty palms up his face, into his sandy locks and down the back of his neck where he let them rest, fingers locked together in a vice-like grip.

Russel had never been part of the agenda and the boy's ultimatum, which Kevin grudgingly admitted was fair, had caused him to fumble more than he ever had in his years of football.

Kevin didn't choose to feel as he did, but he couldn't hold back the rush of emotions he experienced when it came to Russel. It was sensations like that which led him to seek empathy in the chatroom.

Originally, Kevin had joined the chatroom just to find some sort of solace in another desperate gay teen; someone to whom he could finally confess everything that had been racing around in his mind. All he had intended was to gain a friend, a confidant. Not even once did he imagine that his online pen-pal would turn out to be a student at his high school, and never did he believe that the guy would be someone like Russel.

With chocolate brown locks that were stylishly gelled, a boyish smile that ranged from cocky to shy in a matter of seconds, and deep coffee colored eyes that oozed understanding, Russel was very cute. Not to mention that Kevin discovered later on how built he was beneath the polos and baggy, zip-up hoodies. Though he was very appealing eye-candy, Russel's appearance wasn't the only thing that pulled Kevin to the teenage boy.

What first drew him to Russel was that they were both searching for the same thing; acceptance, understanding, support. Both of them felt safe behind closeted doors, but couldn't help know a part of them was missing. Right off the bat the boy had wanted a friend just as Kevin had and after they met at the park, he found himself fixated on the boy with which he shared so much in common.

The class field trip gave him a reasonable chance to get close to Russel without seeming overly suspicious. Admittedly, Kevin hadn't revealed the whole truth to the brunette about joining the science field trip. In truth, he was never going to be any sort of scientist and didn't plan on making the subject a part of his career, but his C plus was a fine grade as far as his coach was concerned, so signing up for the outing wasn't exactly as mandatory as he led Russel to believe. Regardless, that was a secret that Kevin never planned on sharing… or at least, not yet.

During the mini campout, things changed between the two teens. While simply seeking Russel's friendship, Kevin found that as he got to know the boy, he began to like what he discovered. Learning about the other teen's struggles with his father's expectations and his affinity for all things science gave Kevin a clear picture of what he craved from a relationship and Russel was the whole package.

As he continued to learn more about the runner, the football star yearned for their nightly study sessions (though it more involved Kevin copying down Russel's work) and couldn't help the smile that crept up his face when Russel would give him a wave or shy grin or invite him to a casual football match.

And then came the kiss.

That moment was the most right that Kevin had ever felt in his entire life until suddenly it wasn't. Despite constant reassurances from Russel that their relationship was hidden, that his preference for men was unknown, Kevin was always watching over his shoulder, checking for signs that somebody, anybody, suspected.

And now, his muscled legs tugged him forward, almost unwilling, toward the club that was simultaneously his savior and his torturer.

Kevin's teammates spotted him as he neared them and waved him over, trying to goad him into joining their close-minded protest. He walked over to his friends, but whether to join them in their bullying or step through the crowd they had formed, he was still unsure.

He paused in front of the pack of wolves in sheep's' clothing and his mouth opened of its own accord.

"Excuse me. You're blocking my way," he told them with more confidence than he felt.

The shock and outrage and disgust and ignorance that came next roared in his ears.

"What do you mean?"

"You're a fag?"

"Kev, don't you know what you're doing?"

"We won't hesitate to kick you off the team, bro."

"Did Middlebrook make you a queer?"

"Faggot!"

The voices rushed together at once and whirled around him. He couldn't decipher one from another, but it really didn't matter; they were all thinking the same things about him. He was Kevin no longer. He would always be Kevin the Queer, the Gay Kid, the Fag.

Kevin clenched his jaw and formed fists with both hands, preparing for a fight. When no shots hit his face, he shoved his nearest opponent out of the way where he collided with another bully. Kevin pushed and elbowed his way through the throng of homophobic classmates until he reached his haven on the other side of the classroom door.

The door slammed shut interrupting a boy who was speaking up front. The whole group went silent as Kevin finally broke down.

He slid down the door and put his head on his knees while tears flowed freely over his face.

Kevin didn't have to pay much attention to know who the guy was that knelt in front of him and put their foreheads together as he brushed the tears off of Kevin's face.

"It's okay," the boy whispered over and over again. "It's okay."


End file.
